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A year-long journey by the renowned psychiatrist and his writer wife after her terminal diagnosis, as they reflect on how to love and live without regret.
Irvin D. Yalom, MD is professor emeritus of psychiatry at the Stanford University School of Medicine and his most recent book is A Matter of Death and Life, a memoir co-authored with his wife, esteemed feminist author Marilyn Yalom, after her cancer diagnosis. As a mental health professional, Irv has devoted his career to counseling those suffering from anxiety and grief. Even though his professional life has always influenced his published works, never have the two intersected as directly and personally as in A Matter of Death and Life, with its alternating accounts of their last months together and Irv’s first months alone. His books are in nearly 30 languages and millions of copies have been sold worldwide. They include: When Nietzsche Wept (winner of the 1993 Commonwealth Club gold medal for fiction); Love’s Executioner, a memoir; Becoming Myself, a group therapy novel; and his classic textbooks Inpatient Group Psychotherapy and Existential Psychotherapy, which have trained generations of therapists. He lives in Palo Alto, California.
Lori Gottlieb is a psychotherapist and author of the New York Times bestseller Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, which has sold over a million copies and is currently being adapted as a television series. In addition to her clinical practice, she writes The Atlantic’s weekly “Dear Therapist” advice column and is co-host of the popular “Dear Therapists” podcast produced by Katie Couric. She a frequent expert in the media and has appeared on The Today Show, Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, CNN, and NPR’s Fresh Air and her recent TED Talk was one of the Top 10 Most Watched of the Year. Visit her website.
“This beautiful, poignant, and uplifting memoir is a love story, a tale of two incredibly accomplished lives that were lived almost as one, the sum turning out to be so much greater than its parts. It will inspire you and perhaps move you to look differently at your life―it did that for me.” — Abraham Verghese ― author of Cutting for Stone
Internationally acclaimed psychiatrist and author Irvin Yalom devoted his career to counseling those suffering from anxiety and grief. But never had he faced the need to counsel himself until his wife, esteemed feminist author Marilyn Yalom, was diagnosed with cancer. In A Matter of Death and Life, Marilyn and Irv share how they took on profound new struggles: Marilyn to die a good death, Irv to live on without her.
In alternating accounts of their last months together and Irv’s first months alone, they offer us a rare window into facing mortality and coping with the loss of one’s beloved. The Yaloms had numerous blessings―a loving family, a Palo Alto home under a magnificent valley oak, a large circle of friends, avid readers around the world, and a long, fulfilling marriage―but they faced death as we all do. With the wisdom of those who have thought deeply, and the familiar warmth of teenage sweethearts who’ve grown up together, they investigate universal questions of intimacy, love, and grief.
Informed by two lifetimes of experience, A Matter of Death and Life is an openhearted offering to anyone seeking support, solace, and a meaningful life.